52. Learning to Give

A few weeks ago, Greg asked me if I we should give a certain woman a financial gift. We had known this couple for many years, he longer than I, both of them dedicated Jesus-lovers living lives of selfless service in ministry. The husband passed away several years ago. We never see this woman, as she lives some distance away. And now out of the blue, Greg was asking me if I thought we should give her some money.

I was non-committal. “I don’t know,” I said. Greg is very quick to give; I, not so much. I want to be as generous as he is (and, as he would to say, “because God is,”) but I always want to be sure it’s God’s idea and not just some careless and magnanimous impulse of sanctified flesh. Greg always assures me in these cases that even if it wasn’t God’s idea, it’s always good to be “imitators of God” (Ephesians 5:1) and that such an act still brings blessing into our lives. 

The amount we were talking about was $1000. Although I believe that details about our giving should usually be kept quiet, it seems more important here to give the context: it was not just spare change on the table here. 

I suppose I feel (when I am leaning on my own understanding) that if I don’t provide some “balance” here (by resisting Greg a little), then we might eventually run out of money. We are supposed to be trying to save for retirement (at least I usually feel this way), and we’ve been a little late getting started. My quiet angst regarding this matter really comes down to a concern of lack, fear of not having enough. But this is a carnal fear, and it reveals a lack of understanding and trust in who God is and the kind of life He is inviting us into. 

I resolved to honestly ask God if this was what He wanted us to do, still while not encouraging my husband in any way so that I would not feel pressured while I went through the process of sorting it out with God.

In Dallas Willard’s book Life Without Lack, the author begins the preface with a scripture that impacted me so deeply, I didn’t move any further forward in the book for several weeks. Whenever I opened the book, I just read that scripture again and then sat there and thought about it. 

Here it is: “God is able to make all grace abound towards you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work” (2 Corinthians 9:8). What kept me fascinated by this portrayal of God’s generosity was the excessive superlatives throughout: “God is able to make all grace abound towards you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.” It certainly seems to say that when we trust God, there will always be enough to help others and still have plenty left over. 

*  *  *  *  *

In time, I came to believe that giving this money away was something God wanted us to do. Then as I got up early one morning, I felt God suggesting that if I had pretty much arrived at this decision, it was time to follow through, tell Greg of my conviction, and give the gift. So I asked God to really settle my heart in my time with Him this morning and confirm once again that He was with me in my thoughts about this.

As I prepared to get settled on the couch with God, a thought occurred to me out of the blue: That scripture quoted at the beginning of Dallas Willard’s Life Without Lack—I should look that up so I can reread it and think on it awhile. But by the time I was set in my place, I had forgotten all about it. I opened up the book I was currently reading, another one by Willard, called The Spirit of the Disciplines. 

He was talking about the discipline of sacrifice.

The discipline of sacrifice is one in which we forsake the security of meeting our needs with what is in our hands. It is total abandonment to God, a stepping into the darkened abyss in the faith and hope that God will bear us up....

The cautious faith that never saws off the limb on which it is sitting never learns that unattached limbs may find strange, unaccountable ways of not falling. (Page 175)

(Please do not just blow by that last sentence. Stop, re-read it, and think about what it is saying: Those who are timid in their faith, underdeveloped in their trust of God, will not and cannot risk the things in which they are really placing their confidence. They cling to the security of what they have and miss out on the true riches, the glory of seeing God make provision in ways that make no earthly sense. That’s the picture of sitting on a branch, sawing it off, and marvelling at the inexplicable phenomenon of the branch still supporting your full weight. The wealth that you feared you might bankrupt through your generosity will still be there—and even be increased supernaturally. That’s the result of applied faith.)

As I read on, Dallas recounted how as a young man in graduate school, he and his wife, after paying all the bills at the beginning of the month, decided to give their remaining money away secretly, telling no one. A week later they found a $20 bill attached to the steering wheel of their car. 

I set the book aside for a moment. I was struggling to give away a thousand dollars, asking God to speak to me about it. Here was an example of an anonymous gift, but did the degree of sacrifice really compare? What year might that have been, I wondered, given Dallas’s age when he passed away in 2013? What might the price of hamburger have been? Fifty cents a pound? I was trying to get an idea of what the relative value of that gift would be today. 

As I opened the book again and read the next sentence, I felt the nearness of God, because He and Dallas immediately answered my question:

 

“With hamburger at thirty-seven cents a pound, we lived like royalty until the next month, convinced we were enjoying the provisions of the King.” Given the unadulterated quality of hamburger back then, a pound of the same-quality product now would be over seven dollars. That $20 bill in today’s currency would be a $400 gift. This excerpt was right up my alley today. I closed my eyes, teary with gratitude, and marveled at God’s synchronicity. 

Then I opened my Amplified Bible to where I had been reading in 2 Corinthians and picked up at the ninth chapter. I came to a verse that included the words “all grace,” and that suddenly made me remember about the quote I had meant to look up a little earlier. I opened Life Without Lack and found the verse at the beginning of the preface. Again I was amazed: it was the same one as I had just read in the Amplified. I just hadn’t recognized it because of the difference in translations. 

I picked my Bible back up to reread it in the Amplified, but first I went back to the beginning of the chapter to get the full context. I found various phrases popping out at me: 

Now about the offering that is [to be made] for the saints (God’s people…) ... that is why I thought it necessary to … make arrangements in advance for this bountiful, promised gift of yours, so that it may be ready, not as an extortion [wrung out of you] but as a generous and willing gift. (v. 1, 5)

[Remember] this: he who sows sparingly and grudgingly will also reap sparingly and grudgingly, and he who sows generously [that blessings may come to someone] will also reap generously and with blessings. (v. 6)

Let each one [give] as he has made up his own mind and purposed in his heart, not reluctantly or sorrowfully or under compulsion, for God loves (He takes pleasure in, prizes above other things, and is unwilling to abandon or to do without) a cheerful (joyous, “prompt to do it”) giver [whose heart is in his giving]. (v. 7)

Now here is that key verse:

And God is able to make all grace (every favor and earthly blessing) come to you in abundance, so that you may always and under all circumstances and whatever the need be self-sufficient [possessing enough to require no aid or support and furnished in abundance for every good work and charitable donation]. (v. 8)

I was now thoroughly convinced that God wanted us to give this gift. Even as I settled my heart in this acknowledgment, the Lord reminded me (with v. 7): it was important to be “prompt to do it.” The best thing, I felt Him say in my heart, would be to go upstairs and tell your husband of the decision you’ve made. That way, you won’t put it off or even possibly change your mind. 

So that was what I did. Then I described to Greg the process I had just been through, and we talked about the powerful principles involved. Greg summed up (and this is a simple statement but profound): “When we give freely, it’s because we trust our Source.” 

Here is how the discussion wrapped up: It’s a way of life. It’s not just a matter of giving gifts here and there when we decide we should, but giving freely, knowing that we have freely received. If we trust our Source and live in Him, we have an abundance and our cup overflows. We are blessed, and others are blessed, and the love of God is “shed abroad“ (Romans 5:5, KJV): by definition of various online dictionaries, His love is given off, discharged widely beyond its usual limits, expanding as it goes, from God to us and from us to others.